AAAAAARRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

Oh my god, I am at my wits end. There is no discipline in this school. It's like watching an episode of the dog whisperer, where Cesar Milan comes in and tells the owner that they have to impose regulations on the dog's behavior, because a misbehaving dog is an unhappy dog who lacks direction. The kids here have temper tantrums. TEMPER TANTRUMS. They're fourteen years old. It's exactly like the dogs acting out because they are given no direction for their energies. I went back to the second year classes today, after being kept away from them for nearly two weeks, because they were just to unruly. The school brought in a specialist, a judo instructor from another school, to work with the second years on discipline, so he was in our class yesterday and while we taught he disciplined, sort of. I think he was mostly getting a feel for the class. The were a little better behaved, at least for the first half of class. Then at some point, a boy from the other class was parading by on the balcony outside wearing a girls' uniform blazer and necktie, and of course no one could concentrate after that. I had to chase one girl out onto the balcony twice and bring her back to class, and physically restrain another boy (ADHD boy--I'll call him R) from leaving the room.

I'm fed up with the attitude of the second years, and I'm starting to develop a method for dealing with it, and disciplining them, at least in my classes. The problem is, there's no system of punishment in place at my school. To use the Dog Whisperer analogy again, its as if a dog does nine bad things, and then on the tenth bad thing the owner finally yells at it. The dog feels guilty for a bit, but doesn't understand the broader implications.  Then the dog does an eleventh bad thing, and the owner ignores it, and doesn't react again until the 20th thing. It's completely arbitrary, and there's no consistency. Of course the kids act up in class, they know they won't be punished for it. I know we're not allowed to send the kids out of the room. But I've been trying to test the waters on the idea of giving them detention. I've been reading up on classroom management online, and one of the suggestions was to have clearly outlined classroom rules, and if the kids break them, there is a swift, decisive and consistent punishment, and you make it clear to the kid it was their choice, because they knew what the rules were. I want to keep them for detentions when they're supposed to be in sports practice, the point being that they miss something they like, and their teammates are angry at them, thereby creating a disincentive to misbehave in class. But I have a feeling this idea won't fly with the administration. The kids probably have a right to be at practice. With so many rights taking precedence, it kind of makes me wonder where the right to a regulated and productive classroom education falls in the hierarchy. It seems to me, not very high. 

I know they told us not to take on the system and try and change things. But I feel like at least in my classes, I should be able to run things in the way that will best enable me to do my job, and teach the kids what I was hired, at great expense to my town, to teach them. Partly, too, its due to my complete inability to tolerate chaos. I can't work in that kind of environment, and I know the kids are not learning well that way. 

I've noticed a change in my attitude these last few days. Before, I felt like I was the inexperienced one, who had no idea what to do, and I was in awe of all the teachers who knew what they were doing. It's not that I feel like I'm more experienced now; I still have no idea how to teach. But now, looking at the other teachers, I feel a kind of incredulous anger. I know it comes from a culturally judgmental place, so I'm trying to keep it in check. But it just pisses me off so much how they refuse to discipline the students. I keep thinking "In America, this would never be allowed." Granted the American school system is far from perfect. But the students here have emotional issues that are much more immature, I feel, than the average American middle schooler, and because they are locked up in this school all day with no discipline, their immaturity and angst just kind of explode. Someone needs to check it, and NO ONE IS. Fine, if that's how the school wants to raise its students, I can live with that. But I want to be able to create the atmosphere in MY classes that I want, or else I can't do my job.